The strange questions

I’m finding myself asking a lot of weird questions about the baby.

For example, tonight, while holding one of the cats in a facsimile of a burp position, I asked, “So, how hard are you supposed to beat the baby?”

I mean, I’m not advocating beating babies. Beating babies is bad. But at some point, you have to give the baby a bit of a whack to make it burp. How hard? A light pat? A solid whack? Something between? Intuitively, I know I shouldn’t be hitting the baby very hard, becauseĀ beating babies is bad. So my primary concern is less about hitting the baby too hard than it is about not hitting hard enough. What if my baby sits there in great discomfort from a persistent gas bubble because Dad was being too gentle?

What a weird thing it is to ponder babykeeping without an actual baby to run tests on.

2 Responses to “The strange questions”

  1. cck says:

    Please tell me you’re going to take a baby care class. I thought burping meant lightly patting… CG was a total beater baby. Beat the baby; don’t shake the baby.

    I’m also totally willing to let you practice a bit on C^4.

  2. Renee says:

    So…just a note that will prove that all things parenting are extremely dependent on the individuals involved (baby and parent), my kiddos didn’t always burp or need to burp after eating (this is often true with breastfeeding) and if they did I found that moving them from a laying down position to an upright one simply brought up the bubbles…seriously…I hardly ever even patted them. Sometimes I bounced around with them in an upright position for a while to let things “settle”:)
    I love your strange questions…these are the things of life:)

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